Tuesday, 28 April 2009

When I Grow Up

I have got a very, very good friend. a very generous boy. he always lend his shoulder for me in the hard times and share laugh with me in good times. he's always there even I know, I'm only his best friend, nothing more, nothing less. but I don't care, I want him this way and I bet he wants me this way, too. hey, I know you read this, fella, if you read, just lemme know, text me, okaaaaay?? :D


okay, move to the main topic. I chit chatted him that night before his cellphone battery was empty. and here's what we talked about :
me (I) : so, why don't you drive your own car? haven't got any license? hihihi oh dear 15 years-old kiddo~
him (H) : yeeeeeh don't use age please ahahaha. my parents don't allow me to, if I can, I will drive it on my own!
I : that is a sensitive topic, isn't it? :D

I : I have a friend at our grade; he's still 14 and he doesn't really pay attention about it
H : hahahaha I don't care either

H : I never feel my age, uwi


..and what I thought was, oh my god I don't wanna grow old..





next month, I'm going to blow out my seventeen candles. but I'm not ready yet. I don't have guts to. I don't want to step on the next phase of my life, I don't wanna face difficulty, I don't. and I really mean it.


Even now I don't cry if I hear bad news or facing troubles, I don't smile either. I don't have power to control my emotions, for Merlin's Beard, I'm still a child trapped in a half-teenager body!


what else? I have prove enough that I'm not ready to grow up... yet. 17 years old means I'm not a child anymore; I can have my own driving license and KTP, I can go to various places where I can't get in right now (ehm), but still, I must solve my problem alone, I have to. it's a part of growing-up process. and that proves enough right? second, I have to be mature. I am still childish and stubborn; how can I be a mature lady??


oh whatever. dear God, if I can turn back time, I would go back to last year; because I think I didn't do my best. and I want to replay my life, just one more chance, please...

8 comments:

Nanda Soraya said...

dwi justru aku pengen bgt cepet2 17!!!!! seminggu lg loh ;D

Istina said...

iya nda kita cuma beda sehari kan ya? tapi aku beneran ga siap deh huhu

Nunu Fithria said...

maturity is not dated by the calendar kok wi :--)

Serra Annisa said...

cie yang mau 17 :)

Istina said...

Nunu : yes, but I have responsibility (at least) to be like an adult, duuuuuuh

Serra : cie yang udah 17 hahahaha :D

Putri Erdisa Januarti said...

hmm .. me myself prefer to be a so-called childish even when i've got 15 on my hand. lol. :D
overall, nunu was right, wi. you'll not looked so mature when you got 17. the maturity is just depend on you yourself. :)

Istina said...

yeeees but I'm now to childish to be called 17 years old! I can only wish that time will change my personality, to be a better person anyway..

Nanda Soraya said...

wah iya???????? kamu tanggal berapa?