BFF, huh?

when I thought I have found a best friend, I'll try my best to show him/her that I'll always be there whenever, wherever, in every condition, sad or happy, mad and crazy times, every time. well, I thought God have His own plan for meeting me to her, but I know that's a very cruel plan.


she's kind of a teenage drama queen, she's pretty, smart, well-known, independent, and (again, I thought) many people like her too. she's one of a kind. she helped me study, she talked to me like nothings more fun than talking to me, she always spoke good about me, etc. she was my whole world, she was everything. like I thought someone as my world while I am just someone in her world.


and it changed when we moved to higher grade. she began to leave my friends. she always like that, she moves with someone who carries popularity, someone who can influence many people, or someone who everyone respect, and my friends are kind of 'if you know them, they're so freaking funny, but they're not really popular' . she always claims that she's not a social climber, she always proud of it, and she always talk bad about 'it-girls', but hell, talk about reality, she's the one. she moves from good girl-image to a very mean girl.


I didn't really care either, because it's her behavior. she left me too for the same reason, and it still hurt me much. I always wondered, what have I done to her, what if she angry with me, what's wrong with me, etc. and yeah, she left me and she made friend with a girl who's well-known and smarter than me. for god sake,I was alone for about.. 4 months? and she enjoyed herself with her friend, while I was f*cking sad and lonely. good for me I still have many friends outside there, and you know what? she began to 'be friend' again with me when she was angry to her mate. oh God what a true friend.


what I didn't concern about her was; she's a real life gossip girl. she always know about newest and hottest gossips, she gossips much, and when she starts chat with me, I just knew that she must wants to know about recent gossips from my friend, who are coincidentally popular.


and she talks bad about someone. no hard feeling, every women love to gossip, and me too. but I don't talk bad about someone I don't know well, or they don't do something bad to me. I don't like the way she talks, it shows me much about her personality, and it's not a good one. she talks about my friends. they're all good person, but talking bad behind their back? hellooooooo be brave girl if you want to talk, come to our face! she said that we're kind of bitches and stuffs and I think someday I'll go and get her a mirror. my friends have normal fashion sense and she talks about us, that we are freak-a-zoids. at least what she wears are something less stylish than us, damn it!


and now that she's backstabbing me. she talks bad about me behind my back. hoooooooo what can you do, queen bee? I don't even care if you talk about me, but my friends? you better watch out, cara, I don't like your style. and to make it perfect, she put on some smile and nice attitude in front of me until I couldn't imagine how dare she is talking like that.


in the past, if I had a matter with her and someone asked me "What's wrong?" and I answered "Nothing, just my BFF" they would sat down and asked me what had happened.
now, if I get mad to her, sometimes I fold my face and many people ask me "What's wrong?"and if I say "Nothing, just my BFF" they will answer "Oh, her." and pass by like usual. they do know that she's annoying and it's normal to angry to her.


now that I met her, I realized that having friends is not that easy. finding best friend, I mean. it's like, when you have found it again, it wouldn't last forever and I'll counting down until the time we go apart. In friend we can trust? I hope so.